Jewelry Organizer?????

Jewelry Organizer

UPDATE on this post.

I love jewelry.  I do.  In moving to a house as a wife I was having trouble finding a place to put everything, since on top of every surface wasn’t acceptable.  I asked for a jewelry organizer for Christmas.  Look what I received!!  I’m so pleased!! Plus I was inspired by the Pioneer Woman’s recent infatuation with a multitude of jewelry organizers.  (If you aren’t familiar with her, please stop and go read, she’s hilarious and teaches lifelong lessons, like how to make gravy from scratch!)

I actually did accomplish something that day.  I think I will let the pictures speak for themselves!!

Here are the three before shots:

1.       Closed – please ignore the pillows on the floor and the wicked trashcan!

2.       Open with hardly anything to show.

3.       The middle of the process, sprawled all over the bed with remote and laptop within reach (just in case my self-motivation lacked at any moment! LOL)

4.       Open with lots of stuff to show.  (Whew, I can finally find what I’m looking for, as long as I can remember long enough what I’m looking for!! LOL)  Please ignore the power cord and the reflection of my husband’s leg in the mirror as he lays across the bed to take the pics!!!

5. Doesn't it look the same full vs. empty??

And the final picture:

What the jewelry organizer has proved to be very convenient at:  my laptop holder!!  HA!!

Looking Back

So I did something unusual tonight.  I read through ALL of my old blog posts, the same way I used to keep a journal.  I learned so MANY things that I thought it would be important to actually share them with you.

1.       Can you tell from all my posts that I like to make lists?? (Oh wait, not on subject, sorry!)

2.       The areas in which I asked for specific prayer for, I actually feel much stronger and more positive about.  I have to THANK YOU for that.  That says to me, you are reading and you are praying!!  WOW, I’m touched beyond belief.  I’m easy to tear up; just ask my hubby.  He’s beginning to roll his eyes, when I tear up at commercials or worse u-tube videos! LOL 

3.       I never updated the things I needed to update on you.  So there will be blog posts to update you on things.  Mainly the following: jewelry organizer and job.  I figured if I didn’t admit to them I wouldn’t do it.  That being accountable thing really works.  Don’t tell my pastor that I’m admitting he was right!! LOL

4.        I have made SO much personal progress on my feelings of step-mother-hood since starting this blog.  I’m more confident, more able and more willing.  Maybe it has something to do with this.  Nah, it was all you guys, my blog followers!!  LOL

5.       Kiss my husband, oh wait, that’s not for the blog list, sorry!

6.       Last, and definitely not least, there are people out there that care about what I have to write, WOW and THANK YOU!!  Love all of you.  If you need prayer, please leave me a comment, I would LOVE to return the favor!!

Thanks again, for being on this journey WITH me!!  It’s been a pleasure, and I’m looking forward to more!!

Six Months!!

I will be married to my wonderful husband for six months on Monday January 31, 2011.  I can’t believe it!!  It’s such a shock!! Why is it a shock, here is my list of reasons:

1.       I don’t get along well with most people.  At some point and time I find it necessary to get mad and let it affect the relationship.

2.       There were some (and I’m not naming names) who said this might be the biggest mistake of my life.  (And I’m really doing my best not to get in their face and say NA-NA-NA-NA-NA-NA but I might at say our 25^th Anniversary.  Just sayin!)

3.       Some parts of me really expected unhappiness, horrid to admit to, but true.

4.       He has kids.  (And I haven’t killed them {metaphorically speaking of course!})

5.       I’m a picky eater and don’t cook.  (That should’ve spelled doom from the start!)

Now I’m shocked that the list isn’t longer. 

Why, simple.  I’m not the easiest person to get to know.  I tend to build walls and not let people close.  I was hurt at a young age (my dad died of colon cancer when I was nine).  So deep down I was afraid, (key word AFRAID) that old habits would resurface living with another human being 24/7.  They didn’t!!  One reason, we keep God and prayer first!!

On a much lighter note, the depth of our marital love was proved this week; in a very unusual (yet usual for us) way.  We love Dr. Pepper.  And I mean L O V E!!  Not as much as each other, of course.  Well not as much as we love our Lord and Savior; and of course not as much as we do love “our girls”.  Wow, Dr. Pepper (DP) got moved from #2 on the love list to #4, hope he doesn’t mind.  Ok, on to the point.  With the recent snow, rain and ice we ran out of DP, which is practically a sin in and of itself.  (Please see the humor intended in that sentence!)  There was enough left in the last bottle for one last glass.  We both kept “saving” it for one another.  For so long, that when we finally replenished (part weather, part laziness) and I went to poor a glass both for myself and my beloved, IT WAS FLAT!!  Please tell me you see the absurd humor in that!!!  We saved so much, that it was ruined.  Morale to the story is:  Live life like you mean it.  Every day, every way, and in every word!!

Are you waiting . . . . cause I sure am!!

WAIT UPON THE LORD…….

Isaiah 40:31 English Standard Version
but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

I’ve known this for quite some time.  I waited on my husband for 13 years.  Now don’t take that as you just thought it!  I was single after a very unhappy and nasty divorce for 13 years before reconnecting with my hubby.  I went through many trials and tribulations healing from that first marriage.  These are not areas I wish to revisit, at least not yet.  I got VERY close to GOD, a thing in which is easier to do without a husband in the way.  At least, that’s what I think today.  I reserve the right to change my mind at any moment! 

(Knowing me as you ALL do, you will realize I say that about EVERYTHING, just ask my husband, or my dance students.  I’ve many theories, which I’m waiting for someone to prove or disprove.  Usually I leave the disproving to me though, call it my type A-OCD [which should be CDO as to be in abc order, but that’s another and much longer post] personality.)

(Don’t you love my side notes in parenthesis, like you are my very bestest friend and would know these facts about me anyway???  Good.  I do too, this way I can pretend to actually have bestest friends that read my blog! HA!)

Okay, waiting.  I waited on Mr. Right and although not everyone would say they agreed with me.  I found Mr. Right.  He’s so right for me, it’s scary.  He forces me to be a better woman.  I’m not the kind you can force into anything, so that in itself is a miracle.  But again, that’s another post.  I think I’m also a little ADD or even ADHD.  Sorry, please trudge forward and I will do my best to do the same. 

Here is my point.

I thought the waiting was over after I found Mr. Right.

What if I was wrong? (HEAVEN FORBID! And please don’t tell my husband, that I might possibly be admitting to being wrong!)

What if waiting is a life long journey?

Because, now I’m waiting on a close and good relationship with “my girls”.  And although, we’ve made strides of progress, there is still progress to be made.  It’s like I told a student of mine.  Dance is a lifelong art form.  You can continue to learn new and different things within a step or technique.  It’s not a thing where you can learn everything and simply check it off your list.  It doesn’t work that way.  What if life is like that?  You aren’t meant to simply learn something and say, ok I got it, no more work to be done in that area.

We are consistently waiting.  Bottom line:  waiting on Jesus return to then get to spend eternity in the most beautiful place in the world with the most beautiful people we’ve ever met.

So I’m a check off my list kinda gal.  I love to make a list and then check it off.  It’s like laundry, no matter how much you do or try to keep up with; there is always more dirty laundry in the making. 

I think, and a bit afraid, that life is like that too. 

Now, do I lay down and die and say forget it, it’s not worth it.

OR

Do I say, ok list, today I’m gonna win, you may win tomorrow, but today, I put my best foot forward and try to love Jesus and the people close to me the best I can.

Well

I

Choose

The

Second

Option.

Or at least I will try!!

How about you?

What do you think?

Am I nuts?

Wait scratch that last question, would love to hear your theory on waiting!!

So . . . . . . I’m waiting!

P.S.  I know there is no such word as “bestest” but nothing else came close to expressing my feeling of “bestest”.  Grammar experts forgive me. (Which I should’ve asked at the beginning of this blog, grammar is not my strongest point!) J

FOOTBALL

Football

I love football.  My daddy was a high school football coach.  For the most part I’ve been at a high school football game every fall Friday night since before I was born.  I understand football.  Basically the team has four tries to take the ball 10 yards.  I understand football.  I listen, I watch, I even discuss.

HOWEVER

My husband loves football.  I’m not even close to loving football the way my husband does.  My love of football has parameters.  These are my football parameters.  It must be fall or “fall-like” weather.  There must be cheerleaders and dance teams to perform as so the professional dancer in me can critique.  There must be a band to play music to keep my spirits up. 

So it’s January.  I’m SICK of football.  I’m beginning to hate football.  AND THERE ARE THREE WEEKS LEFT IN THIS PRO-SEASON BEFORE THE SUPERBOWL.  Yikes. 

So, the bottom line is this:

Being married has taught me many things (even in the almost six months of blissfully happy marriage). My husband has taught me that I don’t love football.  I only thought I did. 

So, to my husband I must apologize.

I lied.

I don’t love football.

Now that I’ve admitted to that, it is now time to learn how to support my husband’s love of football.  This may be more difficult than being a step-mother. 

I just need to remember I do love this man, even with football 24/7.

Love you baby, I really truly do!

When do the kids come next??

LOL

I'm nervous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m nervous.

Evidently my blog posts have taken to relating directly to my feelings!

So, today hubby had a job interview.  This is a good thing, a really good thing.  Neither of us has been employed full time since June.  HOWEVER, this may mean the honeymoon is over.  This man spoils me completely.  I do not cook, hardly ever; mostly due to the fact that I am a VERY picky eater.  I eat like most 7 year olds.  Embarrassing, I know, but hey it works for me.  I like my body (for the most part, I mean, come on I’m an American woman!)  That and trying new things is a difficult concept for me.  Just to go out with my hubby that first time took some long talks, but that’s another story. And I’m rambling, so on to the serious part of the nervousness!!

This new job may also mean more time alone with “my girls”; which is SCARY!!  I mean we are doing well, however, any changes to our current attack plan, could put that into jeopardy. 

Considering it takes money to live in this house, run the electric, gas and cable, and drives to get “my girls” every 12 days, then he needs to land this job.  However, landing it means more time away from not only “my girls” but also more time away from me.  I know that we can handle anything that comes our way, especially with God by our side and with prayer and petition.  But, hey, I’m nervous about it.  So I’m telling you all about it!!  Hoping and praying it makes me feel better.

. . . . . .

 . . . . . .

  . . . . . . .

Oh yeah, not many people read this blog, cause I’ve decided for “my girls” sake to keep it anonymous; so that I feel free to express my real feelings.  However, no one comments and tells me I’m not crazy.  To a woman who craves “words of affirmation”, this may not have been the smartest way to go about expressing myself.  However, I couldn’t find another way.  Hmmmmm. . . . . . .

Praying for strength and wisdom, and the ability to love “my girls” like no other, I will talk to the blog world the next time I have the self-motivation I get to actually blog.

P.S.  Anybody have any good remedies for motivating oneself?????????  I’m thinking getting the hubby out of the house on a regular basis and forcing my butt to actually fend for myself, may be the best one!  HA!  However, may not be the easiest one!!  YIKES!!  Please, PRAY FOR ME!!!

I'm mad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’m mad!

Yes, that’s right.  I’m mad.

It’s taken me quite awhile to admit it, but yes I’m mad.  And worse, there’s not a dad blaming thing I can do about it.  It ties my stomach in knots.  It makes me cry.  It makes me scream.  It makes me wanna run for the hills.  It’s the most horrific thing a human can go through and there is nothing that I can do to help it.

Oh yeah, you (most likely) don’t know me and don’t know what the heck I’m talking about.  My husband’s son (RLA) was TRAGICALLY killed in an ATV accident in June of 2009.  A mere 12 days after my husband and I started talking through facebook, he went through the most horrific thing in his life.  I was devastated and misunderstood.  It was hard for me to work, it was hard for me to cry, it was just plain hard. 

However, for my husband (a mere high school friend to reconnect almost 20 years later at the time) it was HELL.  I’m sorry there is no other word for it.  A parent SHOULD NOT have to bury a child.  I know; my grandmother did.  My dad died when I was 9.  It is a defining part of my life and who I am.  I know that life is unfair.  I know that life hurts.  I know that you can lose people.  I know a lot about pain and loss.  However, to lose a child that I will never get to be a step-mother to (which I am convinced is the hardest job on earth, not motherhood!) is hard.  You see, it’s not for me to grieve for him, I didn’t know him.  I will never know first hand what his bear hugs were like; or how infectious his laughter and energy were.  It truly kills me that I will NEVER know these things.  It’s the hardest thing I deal with.  I do my best to keep his memory alive and encourage not only my husband, but also “my girls” to tell me their favorite stories.

Just this weekend I learned about my step-son’s laughter.  How unusual it was.  Nobody can describe it to me.  And we can’t find it on video or audio anywhere.  The four of us (hubby, me and the girls) talked about it for quite some time after family game night.  No one could describe it for me.  No it’s not like Dad’s.  No it’s like Mom’s.  It’s not even a combination of the two.  It was his own signature.  Which I am learning is most of what his life was. 

In thinking about how he and I would interact, I’m sure there would be times my straight-laced strict upbringing would disapprove of his social choices.  However, I think I would  be smiling under my “tough teacher” exterior. 

RLA, I will always love you, and I will always do my best to help your family never forget you.  I hope I get to meet you someday, and I also hope you’ve met my dad up in heaven.  And that you are sharing a laugh or two over your experiences.  As my hubby always says, “Miss ya kiddo, see you on the other side someday. . . . “

Self-Motivation???????????

So, today, I need to get off this little butt of mine and accomplish something.  Hmmmm, wonder if I will.  I’ve been feeling a bit “under-motivated” lately.  Like, really self lacking, identifying with the depression medication commercials, thinking I may not reach all of my goals for 2011. (Please forgive my use of the word like, I deleted 48 others.  I am a child of the 80’s like is like in my like vocabulary for life like it or not! Please don’t tell my mother.  And speaking of things not to tell my mother, oh wait, never mind, that list would be way too long!)

However, I’m doing better on my first goal, blog more.  I think this post will make more posts than I made all of 2010, granted I only started in November, but hey, ya gotta start somewhere, right?

The hubby and I discussed goals for 2011.  However, I don’t think we set anything major.  Our goals are always the same, put God first, love unconditionally and have often open and honest communication.  I’m a very strong believer in communication.  Just ask the hubby, I kept him up till 3 am last night asking him heavy life questions.  He loves me enough to stay up and try to honestly answer all of my crazy questions.  I love him so!

I think today I will tackle my new jewelry organizer.  I never can find anything I want to wear.  Yes, thank you cricket chirping blog world.  This is my goal for today.  Please stay tuned for tomorrow and see if I actually accomplish it.  Maybe we should take bets??  My standard bet, a Braum’s double dip.  You win either way! 

So blog world, who’s with me??????????

Jan 1

Today is unusual.  It’s the first day of the rest of my life.  Okay, it’s only the first day of 2011.  And I had high hopes for today, I really did.  I had hopes of actually accomplishing something, but am I??  Nope.  My husband is sick.  Like laying on the couch and throwing up every 4 hours.  Now there is nothing left.  I have a weak stomach, VERY weak.  So if I’m in the room with him, even if he’s not throwing up, I have an upset stomach.  Just thinking about him being sick gives me an upset stomach. 

This fact irritates me, on many levels.  First, I’m so sappy in love with this guy that I get sick when he does, really?  This is pathetic, when did I turn into that girl??  Oh yeah, the first time he touched me, in a dark movie theatre watching “The Proposal”.  Anyway, that’s another post all together.  Second, how non-independent am I that I can’t even have my own stomach feelings.  This is ludicrous (Isn’t there a rap star by that name, but he spells it differently, which is why I had to spell check the word in the first place).  And last, but certainly not least, he is the go get ‘em in our relationship.  The one that gets me on my feel to actually accomplish something on a day off, like getting in the shower, or paying bills, or doing laundry.  Without his oomph I don’t self-motivate well.  So I’m spending the day in front of the TV with the laptop.  And I’m enjoying every single minute, and also feeling guilty.

These are the joys of newlywed life.  I hope he doesn’t get sick often.  In the year in a half we’ve been reacquainted (we graduated high school together, a VERY small high school), he’s NEVER been sick.  Shouldn’t he be finished with the throwing up part of being sick by now?  Shouldn’t he be able to sleep?  This is ridiculous.  Now I’m getting worried.  Okay, must stop.  You don’t know, but I can be very overly melodramatic.  So if I let myself go, he will be dying in the next 30 seconds of some rare disease nobody’s ever heard of.

So please send prayer and any suggestions you may have to make my husband feel better, so that my stomach will CHILL.

Thanks,

My husband’s beloved wife!